Although I barely use tumblr, I still come on every once in awhile to have a look at pictures and what people have posted. It’s quite hard typing on a little keyboard that’s shaped like an Xbox controller, lol.
Where am I now? in an amazing place where even though there is ups & downs, it’s still fantastic. I still live at home with my mum, her partner and his two girls 12 & 10, Rennae and Morgan. They are such lovely girls sometimes, like are like the sisters I never wanted but got any. I’ve had some amazing times with them, good stories and lots of laughs. I am glad that they can trust me with anything and talk to me about their problems/boys and their deceased mother who died 4 years ago. These girls are so smart an like any other child they have their problems in school, and sometimes do not want to go, but they are so good at school and even I didn’t get those grades. I have no idea what I would do if I lost them.
It’s great that my mum has found a stable partner who can put up with her stubborness and independence, as she barely lets anyone help her. He is a great man who wouldn’t change my mum for the world.
For the last few months, we’ve all been helping each other renovate the house, first we did the lounge room/dining area, my room, morgans room, then the hallway and rennaes room. We all have our own themes and they are amazing. It has been a rough time, late nights, being grumpy but we are almost finished.
I started dating my ex again in June, wasn’t a good idea and almost lasted like 2/3 weeks. Never again will I date an ex and have defiantly learnt a lesson. Although 15 years of friendship went down the drain, he didn’t deserve me and all I had to offer. It’s best to say what non damage I have left for a “man” who deserves what I have to offer. If not, well that doesn’t bother me, I like my life without complications.
I finished my Dog Grooming course and have recently quit Animal Studies CERT II, not because I am not enjoying it but because I cannot get enough help that’ll get me to pass the course. However in the future I may go back to complete it when I feel the time is right. Next year however, I do plan on doing another Dog Grooming course, which will include how to run a business, how to manage retail, more grooming of the animals and knowing product knowledge/pricing.
Since July, I have got 6 more tattoos and only 1 being the most meaningful. “I am Strong" on the side of my fore arm. - indicating that no matter what life puts me through and how many obsticals it expects me to jump over, I will do it and I will not let myself down. Life can throw anything at me, but this time instead of falling down and just taking it, I will get back up again and fight. I have been through so much since I was young and I deserve to be strong, not weak and certainly not a coward. This tattoo also helps me and motivates me with loosing weight, sometimes I do give up but it lets me know that I need to keep going, not for boys, not for my family but for me, for my health. I may say I don’t want to live until i’m past 60, but 20 is to young too die.
Diamonds & a heart on both sides of my ankle - I like diamonds in my rings, & I do believe in love, maybe not for me, but defiantly for others.
Batman & Superman on the back on my calves - They were my childhood superheroes and they still are til this day.
A bow on my left middle finger - Because my best friend drew an amazing bow & it looks like a ring lol.
Last month : I signed up to a gym, in the 2 weeks I was there I had lost 7 kilos, I missed a week and I lost another. Although I haven’t been going recently, I am still contributing to exercise at home, as we have a pool. I have stayed at keeping that 8 kilos off and hopefully when my car is fixed I’ll start going everyday again, as there is this amazingly cute attractive guy who goes there at the time I go there, and I don’t know him and I don’t want to know him but to know when I loose all my weight guys like him will actually want me, (such a good motivation) haha.
Since i’ve been here I only had my dog Bailey, but technically I now own my sister Rennaes cat, as I am the only one to pay attention to her lol. Also just a few weeks ago a brought a dwarf lop rabbit he is light & dark grey and his name is Sasuke. We’re thinking of breeding him or getting him desexed and getting a female for a play mate. My mums partner paid for his hutch and my mum and I went to pick it up. It was a cute 2 story house, until my mums partner built another part from a table so now he has a 3 story hutch with grass on the bottom, he is a very spoilt bunny and he is very happy. All my furr babies are spoilt equally and love them very much.
Yesterday I had a mole & lump removed from my face by a plastic surgeon. They are quite concerned about the mole that was growing and may think it is cancerous. I am hoping that it isn’t otherwise they will have to shave more of my hair & make a bigger incision. I will find out Friday morning I hope!
So I am still looking for work, but concentrating on my health and loosing 20kg before December is my goal. And even though I haven’t been to the gym in a while, I am still keeping up with my healthy eating, low kj soft drinks on occasions low kj snacks & a lot of lipton flavoured hot tea! Had actually lost that last kilo by drinking tea, how amazing is that. Have offcially become a tea addict.
Anyway it is time to get some sleep, got the biggest head ache and not feeling very well. Hope you enjoy my big update lol.
It’s my diet blog so that I can keep track and update what I ate, what I did for exercise, how much I weigh and how much I loose.
I will post photos of things that have something to do with diet, exercise and healthy food. I will also post few photos of my naked stomach, I’m not proud of it, but I will be proud of when one-day I loose the amount of weight I plan I will be proud. (If you are disgusted by this that is fine), I will take on some advice, if anyone would like to suggest recipes for food as well. I would love the support because this time I will not give up.
So if you’d like to help me or support me with my diet please follow taylahsnewyearbeginshere @ tumblr.
I don’t want non supporters following, I already.know I’m larger, unfit, and disgusting looking and ugly. Don’t need to be told twice. :-)
Thank you. X
I haven’t written on this is in a long while, guess it’s time I made an effort to do an update.
My life’s been absolute shit, not much of an update but I decided not to dwell on it or even complain, because as shit as it is… I’m pretty content with my life and I couldn’t expect much more for myself. I still may not have a job, a boyfriend, or be living by myself or go out partying wasting the money I do have in my course, but I have a family a very disfunctional one, a roof over my head, food in my tummy and a beautiful dog I get to cuddle up to every night. It may not be the best thing in the world but it is for me.
I have also lost a few “friends”. Not sure how that goes but after all the months/years I worry that I’m a shit friend, I’m starting to realise that they were the shit ones. When am I ever going to find true friends? People = Shit.
I am also now seeing a psychologist, will be seeing her once a month for 10 months. She’s very lovely and has a sense of humor so I am sure the progress for moving forward will be great. For the next month my goals are to..
- walk ten minutes a day.
- keep a food diary. (What I ate that day and what I could do better the next day).
- a frustration journal (what happened, what did I do, on a scale of 1-10 how angry was I).
- my attitude
- and my behavior (which also comes in under the frustration part).
I’m not crazy, lol.
A couple weeks ago I started to read 50 Shades of Grey, I finished it in 3 days, read the second book in 1 day and the 3rd in 2 days. Those books are amazing.
I’ve also started to read a book called Lethal by Sandra Brown & then I’ll read The Haunting by Alan Titchmarsh, until I can buy the book Bared To You. :D
So there’s my life in a nutshell, all the same as it was before, still alone.